Period cramps are the worst, and I am generally not my best self the first day or two.
In my cramp funk I remembered a conversation that I had with a friend a few days back. In this conversation, my dear sweet darling friend revealed to me that she had no clue what it felt like to have period cramps. For her, the monthly lady in red is met with clear blue skies, chirping birds and rainbows. It is business as usual.
I must admit that during our conversation, I felt all types of ways, and jealousy was the ring leader. However, I had an ah ha moment when I realized that no matter how hard I tried to explain, and no matter how hard she tried to understand, she would never quite get it. She could imagine the pain, and maybe go a little further and wince at the pictures of discomfort I have painted for her with the images of me sprawled belly down on whatever flat surface is closest — and with every bit of affection and compassion, she would say heartfelt words like dang girl! Sorry. That sucks! and I would just have to embrace it like a warm hug because in that moment, that is honestly the best she’s got.
This got me thinking about the unrealistic expectations we place on others, expectations that demand ribbon tied responses or reactions, preferably with the potency of an epidural to instantly make us feel better. But then, when our rubik’s cubed feelings still remain the same after they have exerted themselves saying all they could say from their own interpretation and comprehension of things, and their level of awareness and exposure, we spaz. We are dissatisfied with their efforts because we expect them to walk in our shoes even though the shoes don’t fit.
I wish that grace dispensing bank machines could be strategically positioned on the corner of every block, because the world is in dire need of it. grace.
Grace that fixes your falling crown before anyone else sees that it’s even crooked. Grace that gives the strength to abide and endure uncomfortable situations for the sake of another. Grace to see beyond self, and be selfless. Grace to be intentional. Grace to know that not getting the perfect answer, response or reaction from a friend or partner in the exact moment that we want it does not mean they didn’t give their best, are inadequate or are incapable of being a helping hand in other ways. Grace to be present. Grace to accept that no man, woman, child or thing on this God given earth can satisfy like the God that created them. Grace to be attentive. Grace to give even when ignored or rejected. Grace to be understanding and to accept that we will not always be understood. Grace to not measure our expectations of others on a scale better suited to us. Grace to patiently wait for the rainbow after the storm. Grace to actually see the rainbow after the storm. grace.
Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. |1 Peter 4:20, NIV|
Happy monYAY 💕