I came across a story of a young pastor who took his life, and my heart broke.
I thought about him, and wondered what it was that tipped him over the edge. What was the last straw? What broke the camel’s back?
My heart broke because so often we forget that strong people also need lifting. We bombard them with weights that are meant for God, casting all our cares on them as if they are God. We forget to declare faith words over their lives. We forget to intercede for them. We forget that besides us – the congregation, is a smaller unit – the family that sacrifice daily for the access we have to what should be all theirs. For our benefit, they give, give, give and give some more.
I have never understood suicide; that pitch black blurred moment when a person is convinced that all hope is lost. But I definitely know how easy it is to log the burdens of others around, also forgetting to cast them unto God. I know how easy it is to get so used to being needed, that you forget to recoup. You shelf yourself, and all the way to the back, to collect dust. It hurts my very core that this man knew a great God, walked with and served Him with his life, yet somehow lost hope. Everything in me cried out for mercy, for him. For his family. For his church.
At first sight, all seems perfect. He is handsomeness on long legs, with a gorgeous perfect family. But men and women of God also fight battles. Battles none of us could last a minute fighting. They are doing God’s work, so the devil works that much harder. We cannot and should not leave them exposed. As a church, we need to stop idolizing the pulpit, and remember that the men and women that stand up there are still human, with human conditions; insecurities, fears, disappointments, failures, weaknesses, feelings, needs, wants and so on. They need God as much as we do. They need prayers as much as we do. They need encouragement as much as we do.
As much as they pour into us, we also need to pour into them.
Perfect is unreal. It is an evaporating mist that cannot be canned. Purpose is real, and I believe that this young pastor lived out his purpose until his very last breath. Like everyone else thats been lost to suicide, the world mourns because all those precious gifts, talents, personalities and ideas are now buried with them. We no longer get the pleasure of sitting in the joy of their presence. We now only have memories, and the lingering question…why?
The well of their lives overflowed with life giving water, but for a split second, they were convinced otherwise. I have tears welling up in my eyes as I write this, because it’s a major loss. Those on the outskirts will move on. However, those in the village, his tribe, will not. The loss will remain a gaping hole, that time may or may not heal. But I am so thankful that human failures and deficiencies are not a reflection of God’s nature. Even when we do not understand, He remains God. And where we fail to stand in, He comes through, and remains near to the broken hearted.
That’s why I plead with you, because of our union with our Lord Jesus Christ, to be partners with me in your prayers to God. My dear brothers and sisters in the faith, with the love we share in the Holy Spirit, fight alongside me in prayer. Ask the Father to deliver me from the danger I face from the unbelievers in Judea. For I want to make sure that the contribution I carry for Jerusalem will be favourably received by God’s holy ones. Then he will send me to you with great joy in the pleasure of God’s will, and I will be spiritually refreshed by your fellowship. |Romans 15:30, TPT|
Please, remember to make others a prayer point too. Life is more than just you. Much more. So much more.
image @ pinterest