It’s only the third week in January, and right off the bat, real life!
I interviewed for a position that was by all accounts perfect on paper. I truly believed it was mine, so much so that I could already see myself in the office doing great work, and making great strides for the organization. I was ready.
I had compared it to the list of my ideal job and BOOM, a 90% match. An ace score in my books. Yes God, thank you! I am so ready!
For the first time in a long time, it was less about the money (though important 😂😛), and more about the actual work and the population served. I was excited, and looked forward to providing quality service and making an impact. Again I say, I was ready.
I did everything right. I prepped for the interview like it was a board exam. I buckled down during the interview and put my best pedicured foot forward. I was real about my passions, professional experiences, goals and the added value I would bring to the organization . We even had more than a few laughs talking about things not interview related. Afterwards, I sent a thank you note, and it was a genuine one too.
Of course, prayers went up pre interview, declarations during and thanksgiving post. Did I already say I was ready?
To be frank, I wanted an answer as soon as I stepped out of the office. So the month long wait was hella uncomfortable. But I wasn’t anxious. I was confident, and acted accordingly, preparing myself for an offer. But well, that offer never came. Instead, I got an email stating that though it was a difficult decision, they had to go with someone else.
I was disappointed, and yes it hurt. I could not understand it. This wasn’t my first no. I have gotten quite a few rejection letters in my day (I still have most of them). But this one…wow!
The cool thing is that this past year, my walk with God has been different. More intimate. I am about Him for real – His heart, not His hand. So even though I feel the impact of the blows…and may even have a few knots as a result, they no longer knock me out.
I am more trusting and less whinny. As is normal, I thought ‘why’? But I didn’t let myself brood over it. I just remember saying, Ok Lord I can’t lie I am disappointed. I am frustrated, and I am completely totally absolutely waaaay over the wait. But I know you are in control, and thats all I need to hold on to my peace and joy. And then I said…thank you for having my back and for the greater thats to come.
I had a restless sleep that night, but it was more due to the gas caused by whatever I ate. My stomach was on the fritz!!!
Nope, I am not immune to rejection. The word ‘no’ still very much tickles, but my God. He is faithful.
PS: God’s word to me just before I received the nope it ain’t gon’ be you email was…
See I am doing a new thing, now it springs up, do you perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.Isaiah 43:19, NIV
This word was the shield I needed to field off those feelings of self doubt, not enough and woe is me thoughts when met with a rejection I never experred.
If God is all that He says He is, and His word is true, this right here is just the appetizer.
Again I say, He is faithful.
Happy monyayyyy! 💛
An honest and heartfelt post! At times like this I remember Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” and I say it to myself over and over and over again. The future He has planned for us is not immediately evident, but it is on it’s way and it is better than what we thought was good for us.
And yes, “If God is all that He says He is, and His word is true, this right here is just the appetizer.”
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You got that right mami! Thanks for this scripture as well! x