HOMEsick

I am laying in bed right now, in awe of God’s grace and mercy. His unrelenting love for me never gets old. I don’t understand it, but it sure is comforting to know that I cannot outrun it.

Reels of my past flash before my eyes as I stare at the ceiling. The prodigal years. Years filled with every conceivable pleasure, yet fraught with immense loneliness. Those were the years I knew of a God, but did not know Him. I read His words with a hardened heart, and exchanged His truth for lies. Thankfully, I was humbled by life. It’s rise and falls showing me just how little control I had. It softened my heart; made it mouldable, and on His one millionth attempt to get my attention, I was ready. I desired His salvation, but didn’t want it to end there. I wanted to dive into the deep places of Him. I wanted more.

I am always so amazed that the same God who spoke the stars to be, speaks to me. It would be like the Queen of England (not her aids) trekking the sands and seas for me, and doing so repeatedly until she finds me. When she finds me, she does not leave me there. Instead, she brings me into her palace and asks me to make it home. She tells me that I am at liberty to partake of all that is royal. I would be more than happy with this, but she goes even further, and gives me access to her inner room, where I am allowed to sit on her bed, right next to her and talk. No middle man. No guards. Just she and I. It’ll probably be awkward at first, being in the presence of royalty and all, but the more I take her up on her offer to sit with her, the more we talk, and the more of a relationship we build.

Now the chances of the above happening are zero to none, but with God, every day presents a new opportunity to sit with Him. There is no end to this journey on this side of eternity, for there is always more in Him.

Listen. The stars He spoke to being eons ago, remain suspended in obedience to Him, and sparkle in heavy sheets of darkness. Imagine what His word can do in, and through you. Whatever He has spoken, is so. The question is…do you believe?

I came across this quote in a Huffpost article, when we feel homesick, we are feeling insecure or uncomfortable with where we are, physically and emotionally. We are longing for something that is known, predictable, consistent and stable. This about sums up my prodigal years. I was homesick, no longer satisfied by the usual. I yearned for Eden, walking hand in hand with God, soothed by His voice, and housed in His embrace.

They say “home is where the heart is”, and my heart for as long as it was in the hands of another was never home. No matter how hard I tried, the puzzle pieces did not fit until I found my place in God.

I pray that like me, you find your way home, to the Father who loves you endlessly, in all ways and always! Like Dorothy famously said in the Wizard of Oz, “there is no place like home”.

Happy monyaaay!

Xo, Mel

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